Alone at last,
just you and me again,
and the spell you cast on my heart
a lifetime ago.
How bizarre
to have you sing your final song
in such a sterile room,
one not deserving of your presence,
your style, your grace...
but you had a way of making everything around you sparkle,
like bursts of blinding light
in the evening sky,
because you were here.
With your hand in mine,
it matters little where we are
or how we got here,
as long as we traveled as one
and caressed each moment
as though it were our last.
You have done that, my Lady, and more,
your spirit melting into the sky,
unfolding like petals of a rose
under tears of morning dew.
I whisper to the world...come back to me Babe,
but your silent heart
answers me no more.
I know now
I will never again see your footprints in the garden,
and the truth is overwhelming...
the truth is unimaginable.
It is time to kiss you goodbye, but I hesitate,
for unlike Siamese twins,
we are not only connected at the hip,
we share the same soul.
I fear that in losing you, I lose me as well.
I must leave you now,
to begin my walk alone, to regain my footing,
but my heart protests and I am immobile,
like a petrified stone in a forest of shadows.
I feel anchored with your kiss,
your lips like velvet,
still warm from the morning sun.
I must leave now, but before I go,
like a thief in the night,
I was born to steal...
one last kiss.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
ETERNAL FRIEND
I am like a lizard
moving through your garden,
uncertain of what lies in wait;
willing and unwilling to sacrifice
significant parts of me,
so what remains endures.
Or I could be a bird
dancing in our fountain,
in constant motion,
fearful of silent footsteps
lurking, but never fading.
You are my true connection,
my link to the world.
Without you, my lifeline is broken.
Without you, I am adrift
in an ocean of illusion
that vanished with our dreams
in a tragic turn of fate.
But you are also my compass,
my guide to daylight in darkness.
You are my eternal friend,
through whose eyes
I see hope and purpose.
I can tell your secret to the wind,
your shadow beside me
in every minute, of every memory, of every adventure,
or I can share your tenderness with those
who, if they knew you,
would miss you forever,
as do I.
So we will travel together, as always,
linked not only by love,
but most importantly, by respect
for ourselves and each other.
Your deep passion of life and beyond
fills me with hope.
The thought of you
takes my breath away.
I am intoxicated by you.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
moving through your garden,
uncertain of what lies in wait;
willing and unwilling to sacrifice
significant parts of me,
so what remains endures.
Or I could be a bird
dancing in our fountain,
in constant motion,
fearful of silent footsteps
lurking, but never fading.
You are my true connection,
my link to the world.
Without you, my lifeline is broken.
Without you, I am adrift
in an ocean of illusion
that vanished with our dreams
in a tragic turn of fate.
But you are also my compass,
my guide to daylight in darkness.
You are my eternal friend,
through whose eyes
I see hope and purpose.
I can tell your secret to the wind,
your shadow beside me
in every minute, of every memory, of every adventure,
or I can share your tenderness with those
who, if they knew you,
would miss you forever,
as do I.
So we will travel together, as always,
linked not only by love,
but most importantly, by respect
for ourselves and each other.
Your deep passion of life and beyond
fills me with hope.
The thought of you
takes my breath away.
I am intoxicated by you.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
FEELINGS
Funny thing about feelings.
They are neither debatable
nor negotiable.
They are neither right
or wrong.
They can't be justified,
rationalized, or vindicated.
They just are.
You own them.
They can not be purchased,
leased, or sold.
They are not open for discussion
or external interpretation.
They are a reflection
of your soul.
They are you...
dancing beween the flowers
and the stars,
appearing and vanishing at will,
like sudden bursts of color
reflected in still water.
They are you...
glimpses
of treasured moments of happiness
interrupted
by effortless moments of grief.
Asleep or awake,
they travel through the shadows with me,
connected by dreams
of bright daylight.
They are my history.
They are me...
They are my biography,
written by you
as you sleep.
They are you.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
They are neither debatable
nor negotiable.
They are neither right
or wrong.
They can't be justified,
rationalized, or vindicated.
They just are.
You own them.
They can not be purchased,
leased, or sold.
They are not open for discussion
or external interpretation.
They are a reflection
of your soul.
They are you...
dancing beween the flowers
and the stars,
appearing and vanishing at will,
like sudden bursts of color
reflected in still water.
They are you...
glimpses
of treasured moments of happiness
interrupted
by effortless moments of grief.
Asleep or awake,
they travel through the shadows with me,
connected by dreams
of bright daylight.
They are my history.
They are me...
They are my biography,
written by you
as you sleep.
They are you.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
Sunday, July 22, 2007
LUCCA
We planned on a visit to Lucca,
the birthplace of Giacomo Puccini,
to kiss the ground that produced a man
that composed musical magic.
But even a master magician would be powerless
in recreating the sound of your laughter;
pure joy with no boundaries.
I hear your melody everywhere,
in things you touched and didn't touch;
the hummingbirds quietly dining on the nectar
of the kangaroo paws in the garden;
the silk curtains you made that dance to the music
of the wind through the window;
the purring of our cat, Woodrow, curled up in your reading chair...
waiting.
You are everywhere...and I think of you.
I think of us.
You are in my bones...in my DNA.
The best of me is you, and you are with me always.
You are music.
Y0u are my symphony.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
the birthplace of Giacomo Puccini,
to kiss the ground that produced a man
that composed musical magic.
But even a master magician would be powerless
in recreating the sound of your laughter;
pure joy with no boundaries.
I hear your melody everywhere,
in things you touched and didn't touch;
the hummingbirds quietly dining on the nectar
of the kangaroo paws in the garden;
the silk curtains you made that dance to the music
of the wind through the window;
the purring of our cat, Woodrow, curled up in your reading chair...
waiting.
You are everywhere...and I think of you.
I think of us.
You are in my bones...in my DNA.
The best of me is you, and you are with me always.
You are music.
Y0u are my symphony.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
THE DANCE
I watched a man named Memo
dance to the sensual sounds of Cuba;
soul beats from the streets of New York;
Columbia oozing from his veins
like water from a fountain.
He looked at his woman the way I looked at you,
an electric connection that could not be denied.
They were one in a sea of choreographed waves
that roll to shore but only have impact
on a solitary grain of sand.
They were complete.
They were what once was.
They were us.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
dance to the sensual sounds of Cuba;
soul beats from the streets of New York;
Columbia oozing from his veins
like water from a fountain.
He looked at his woman the way I looked at you,
an electric connection that could not be denied.
They were one in a sea of choreographed waves
that roll to shore but only have impact
on a solitary grain of sand.
They were complete.
They were what once was.
They were us.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
THE SWING
My weight shifts and the swing moves,
but I am on unfamilar territory.
This is your swing
built by a friend
to hang in a patch of shade
thrown by a latticed sky.
It faces a garden that blooms
only for you.
Awash with jasmine in sunlight,
the orchids and callas thrive
but miss your touch,
as does the red rose I planted for you,
as do I.
Blades of emerald green fesue
shift with the wind,
standing tall with pride
for having been planted by you
long ago.
Your dust is of the earth,
and you will return to the earth
in gardens throughout the world
to continue your journey
through my eyes.
Your passage to immortality
honored by every petal of every flower.
Their beauty touched by your essence.
Through you the earth will heal.
Through you I heal.
Through you I keep.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
but I am on unfamilar territory.
This is your swing
built by a friend
to hang in a patch of shade
thrown by a latticed sky.
It faces a garden that blooms
only for you.
Awash with jasmine in sunlight,
the orchids and callas thrive
but miss your touch,
as does the red rose I planted for you,
as do I.
Blades of emerald green fesue
shift with the wind,
standing tall with pride
for having been planted by you
long ago.
Your dust is of the earth,
and you will return to the earth
in gardens throughout the world
to continue your journey
through my eyes.
Your passage to immortality
honored by every petal of every flower.
Their beauty touched by your essence.
Through you the earth will heal.
Through you I heal.
Through you I keep.
© JOHN PISCATELLA
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Final Posting (Florine)
A friend of my friends, poetic and kind, wrote some words that are an appropriate ending to Florine"s saga as seen through my eyes:
"We're all muddling through life for a reason,
Unclear as it sometimes may be,
And the highs and lows of experience are just
two different sides of the same spinning coin.
In the end all that really matters is the effort you
Make to do the most with your particular place in time.
- Frankie Laine
Goodbye Babe,
My love through eternity..
John
THE END
"We're all muddling through life for a reason,
Unclear as it sometimes may be,
And the highs and lows of experience are just
two different sides of the same spinning coin.
In the end all that really matters is the effort you
Make to do the most with your particular place in time.
- Frankie Laine
Goodbye Babe,
My love through eternity..
John
THE END
Friday, July 6, 2007
Florine's Gift
Florine loved me so much that she left me a special gift when she died...
the meaning of true friendship and generosity of spirit.
When the demons came to haunt me, I wasn't alone.
In a way, I have lost my friends along with my Babe.
They are no longer just friends...They are now family, and I love them
with all my heart.
I would like to thank all my friends and neighbors for their help and generousity. However, I did receive a beautiful flower arrangement without a card , so please understand that I would thank you if I could.
Also, love to my friends and family (Florine's is mine too) who disrupted their busy schedules to fly here (if only for a few hours) from all parts of the United States to be at Florine's " Celebration Of Life" service. I am humbled at the response, but not surprised, because she had meaning to all who crossed her path.
I would like to share a letter with you from my new family members, Jackie and Stan Drosch, who, along with my other family members- Carol Parker, Chistina Parodi, Bob & Shelly Bushman, and Elaina & Yudi Hershowitz... never waivered with their love and support. I could not have gone through this nightmare without them.
I would also be remiss if I didn't thank my long time friends Bob Barry & Kathy Byrd for their love, time, and professional support, along with Justin & Karen Cunningham for being there when I needed them.
They all, most definitely, "Walked the Walk'....when it mattered.
Dearest John -
A beautiful day honoring precious Florine. The church service was lovely - the music - perfect and very beautiful, just like your Florine! Christina's words were remarkable! Her expression of love with each and every word was so remarkable - remarkable because we were all thinking of those very same words - but none of us could ever express it in public like she did yesterday!
Your poem on the back of the program was the BEST of all. You are very, very talented and should definitely write poetry! Both of you, so artistic - a real gift, indeed.
Now you face your new chapter of life, without your precious Babe - we know how difficult it will be - but please realize we are all here for you. We ALL will miss our dearest Florine so very, very much - we all agreed yesterday what a huge part is missing in our lives - so we can well imagine how hard it is for you.
The gathering of friends and family in your beautiful home was perfect - everyone asked each other how we met Florine & you and etc. So, it was a lovely healing experience - just part of the healing process - hopefully for all of us - time will help us to heal our great sorrow. We will always remember Florine's smiling face - her wonderful wit - her whimsical laugh - her remarkable skills - her fabulous artistic ability at everything she tackled and most of all for me, her sound advice whenever I asked her to help me! Yes, we all will miss her so - we loved her so much.
Everything at the house yesterday worked out very well. The garden - the food - family and friends - the drinks.......Everything looked perfect - even the beautiful fruit on the trees! That fig tree amazes me - you cut it back to nothing and just a few months later it's almost blooming with fruit! Mr. Greenthumbs, indeed! I'm sure you must have tons of leftovers - but the family should wipe those out in no time! It was a pleasure meeting your brother, Joseph. He is insisting that you come to visit him in Gig Harbor next month. We agreed - it would be so relaxing for you. A healthy get-away to a beautiful place with family - just the medicine you need in a month from now! I am taking care of all the cancellations for Italy. No worries.
Call us when you feel like it. We understand that you need to be alone for a few days to "regroup" after so much emotional termoil. WE ARE HERE FOR YOU - DAY OR NIGHT! Love you dearly. Take care. Speak to you very soon. Lots of Love, Jackie & Stan
Thanks for the gift Babe,
My Love Forever,
John
the meaning of true friendship and generosity of spirit.
When the demons came to haunt me, I wasn't alone.
In a way, I have lost my friends along with my Babe.
They are no longer just friends...They are now family, and I love them
with all my heart.
I would like to thank all my friends and neighbors for their help and generousity. However, I did receive a beautiful flower arrangement without a card , so please understand that I would thank you if I could.
Also, love to my friends and family (Florine's is mine too) who disrupted their busy schedules to fly here (if only for a few hours) from all parts of the United States to be at Florine's " Celebration Of Life" service. I am humbled at the response, but not surprised, because she had meaning to all who crossed her path.
I would like to share a letter with you from my new family members, Jackie and Stan Drosch, who, along with my other family members- Carol Parker, Chistina Parodi, Bob & Shelly Bushman, and Elaina & Yudi Hershowitz... never waivered with their love and support. I could not have gone through this nightmare without them.
I would also be remiss if I didn't thank my long time friends Bob Barry & Kathy Byrd for their love, time, and professional support, along with Justin & Karen Cunningham for being there when I needed them.
They all, most definitely, "Walked the Walk'....when it mattered.
Dearest John -
A beautiful day honoring precious Florine. The church service was lovely - the music - perfect and very beautiful, just like your Florine! Christina's words were remarkable! Her expression of love with each and every word was so remarkable - remarkable because we were all thinking of those very same words - but none of us could ever express it in public like she did yesterday!
Your poem on the back of the program was the BEST of all. You are very, very talented and should definitely write poetry! Both of you, so artistic - a real gift, indeed.
Now you face your new chapter of life, without your precious Babe - we know how difficult it will be - but please realize we are all here for you. We ALL will miss our dearest Florine so very, very much - we all agreed yesterday what a huge part is missing in our lives - so we can well imagine how hard it is for you.
The gathering of friends and family in your beautiful home was perfect - everyone asked each other how we met Florine & you and etc. So, it was a lovely healing experience - just part of the healing process - hopefully for all of us - time will help us to heal our great sorrow. We will always remember Florine's smiling face - her wonderful wit - her whimsical laugh - her remarkable skills - her fabulous artistic ability at everything she tackled and most of all for me, her sound advice whenever I asked her to help me! Yes, we all will miss her so - we loved her so much.
Everything at the house yesterday worked out very well. The garden - the food - family and friends - the drinks.......Everything looked perfect - even the beautiful fruit on the trees! That fig tree amazes me - you cut it back to nothing and just a few months later it's almost blooming with fruit! Mr. Greenthumbs, indeed! I'm sure you must have tons of leftovers - but the family should wipe those out in no time! It was a pleasure meeting your brother, Joseph. He is insisting that you come to visit him in Gig Harbor next month. We agreed - it would be so relaxing for you. A healthy get-away to a beautiful place with family - just the medicine you need in a month from now! I am taking care of all the cancellations for Italy. No worries.
Call us when you feel like it. We understand that you need to be alone for a few days to "regroup" after so much emotional termoil. WE ARE HERE FOR YOU - DAY OR NIGHT! Love you dearly. Take care. Speak to you very soon. Lots of Love, Jackie & Stan
Thanks for the gift Babe,
My Love Forever,
John
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Ode to Florine (used at memorial service)
She left her scent in the deserts
and deltas of Africa.
The peacefulness of Thailand
embraced her grace and beauty.
Bali was exotic, but she was the flower...
an orchid of endless motion.
Her heart showed me my way
to Portugal and Spain,
where we kissed the rain
and dined on sopa de mariscos.
Or Paris, where her life was tinted
with colors of her heritage...
To London,
where a young adventurous soul ached for change...
Caracas and Cartagena appealed to her wild heart...
Vietnam to her misty soul.
She was my rock star,
one name,
recognized by all who were moved by her.
She was...Florine
And her light can never be extinguished
or forgotten.
I loved her before we ever met.
-John
© JOHN PISCATELLA
and deltas of Africa.
The peacefulness of Thailand
embraced her grace and beauty.
Bali was exotic, but she was the flower...
an orchid of endless motion.
Her heart showed me my way
to Portugal and Spain,
where we kissed the rain
and dined on sopa de mariscos.
Or Paris, where her life was tinted
with colors of her heritage...
To London,
where a young adventurous soul ached for change...
Caracas and Cartagena appealed to her wild heart...
Vietnam to her misty soul.
She was my rock star,
one name,
recognized by all who were moved by her.
She was...Florine
And her light can never be extinguished
or forgotten.
I loved her before we ever met.
-John
© JOHN PISCATELLA
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Memorial Service Information
Thanks again to all of you for your love and support through this difficult time. Please join us in a celebration of Florine's life. The details are below:
From the North: Use I-5 South, exit Sea World Dr. & Tecolote Rd. and proceed left at stoplight toward Morena Blvd. Turn right on Morena, left on Napa, and left on Linda Vista Rd. Travel to the second stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
From the South (or the airport): Use I-5 North, exit Morena Blvd. (signs will say: Morena Blvd. use I-8 East) Stay to the right and follow the signs for Morena Blvd. Take the first right onto Linda Vista Rd. Travel to the third stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
From the East: Use I-8 West, exit at Morena Blvd., go right onto Linda Vista Rd. and travel to the third stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
Parking – Directions for parking will be given at the kiosk at the entrance to the campus. Parking areas for memorial service parking will be marked.
Memorial Service to Celebrate Florine’s Life
Thursday - July 5, 2007
10:00 A.M.
The Church of the Immaculata (619-574-5700)
5998 Alcala Park, USD Campus, San Diego, Ca 92110
Pastor – Rev. Matthew D. Spahr
Directions to USD Campus:
From the North: Use I-5 South, exit Sea World Dr. & Tecolote Rd. and proceed left at stoplight toward Morena Blvd. Turn right on Morena, left on Napa, and left on Linda Vista Rd. Travel to the second stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
From the South (or the airport): Use I-5 North, exit Morena Blvd. (signs will say: Morena Blvd. use I-8 East) Stay to the right and follow the signs for Morena Blvd. Take the first right onto Linda Vista Rd. Travel to the third stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
From the East: Use I-8 West, exit at Morena Blvd., go right onto Linda Vista Rd. and travel to the third stoplight to USD's East entrance, turn left and enter campus.
Parking – Directions for parking will be given at the kiosk at the entrance to the campus. Parking areas for memorial service parking will be marked.
Although Florine loved flowers, it would be her wish to support Breast Cancer Research.
Donations may be made in Florine's name to Susan G. Komen for the Cure or a charity of your choice.
Donations may be made in Florine's name to Susan G. Komen for the Cure or a charity of your choice.
Susan G. Komen for the Cure
4699 Murphy Canyon Road #207
San Diego, Ca. 92123
4699 Murphy Canyon Road #207
San Diego, Ca. 92123
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Florine's Journey
Florine is gone.
She sleeps, forever surrounded by love.
Goodnight my Queen. Your smile changed my destiny.
As a poet once said,
" No one else will sleep in my dreams. We are complete like a single river,
like a single grain of sand."
John
She sleeps, forever surrounded by love.
Goodnight my Queen. Your smile changed my destiny.
As a poet once said,
" No one else will sleep in my dreams. We are complete like a single river,
like a single grain of sand."
John
Florine's Condition
Although Florine is no longer on the breathing tube, she continues, due to her amazing physical condition (primarily her heart and lungs), to grace us with her presence for another day...or until she decides otherwise.
No matter what the short term outcome, we will still celebrate her life on Thursday to bring closure to her beautiful and caring family, while they are here in San Diego.
I would like them to take comfort in witnessing the incredible network of friends that, like me,
have been touched by my Lady.
Details will follow.
Thanks to all,
John
No matter what the short term outcome, we will still celebrate her life on Thursday to bring closure to her beautiful and caring family, while they are here in San Diego.
I would like them to take comfort in witnessing the incredible network of friends that, like me,
have been touched by my Lady.
Details will follow.
Thanks to all,
John
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Florine's Condition
As you all are aware from my previous comments, hope is diminished, and my Babe's beautiful journey through life is quickly coming to an end.When it does, a piece of me will go with her...and be lost forever. Her smile is just to big for this earth.
The multiple contusions to all parts of her brain, particularly the brain stem, have created a long term prognosis that is not acceptable to Florine. She indicated her wishes to me 37 years ago, but more importantly, provided direction in a signed health directive that has enabled her to be in complete control of her death, as she has always been in life.
She just celebrated her 59th birthday, but in terms of quality of life- and living it wth sheer gusto, you would have to double it in comparison to others that have kissed this earth. To me, she is magic.
Florine's family will be here tomorrow to bring their love and goodbyes. When the time is right, I will be alone with her to kiss my baby goodnight.
When the breathing tube is removed, Florine will determine how long we have the privilege of her presence, and her strength can not be denied.
Arrangements are being made for family and friends, and all who loved her, to share a celebration of her life. The time will be 10:00 am, Thursday, July 5th, at the Immaculata (University of San Diego). Details, including directions, will follow in upcoming posts.
If Florine could, she would thank all our friends and neighbors for the love and support offered during this perilous storm in the heat of summer.
I am her messenger...and I thank you with all my heart.
John
The multiple contusions to all parts of her brain, particularly the brain stem, have created a long term prognosis that is not acceptable to Florine. She indicated her wishes to me 37 years ago, but more importantly, provided direction in a signed health directive that has enabled her to be in complete control of her death, as she has always been in life.
She just celebrated her 59th birthday, but in terms of quality of life- and living it wth sheer gusto, you would have to double it in comparison to others that have kissed this earth. To me, she is magic.
Florine's family will be here tomorrow to bring their love and goodbyes. When the time is right, I will be alone with her to kiss my baby goodnight.
When the breathing tube is removed, Florine will determine how long we have the privilege of her presence, and her strength can not be denied.
Arrangements are being made for family and friends, and all who loved her, to share a celebration of her life. The time will be 10:00 am, Thursday, July 5th, at the Immaculata (University of San Diego). Details, including directions, will follow in upcoming posts.
If Florine could, she would thank all our friends and neighbors for the love and support offered during this perilous storm in the heat of summer.
I am her messenger...and I thank you with all my heart.
John
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